Friday, August 17, 2012

No, it's Not Just You..

I'm losing my mind, too! For example, today, my four year old admitted to her brother she was being miserable. While trying to set up her Lalaloopsy dolls, accessories, furniture...etc. she had become increasingly frustrated that nothing would stay put and that her brother was trying to play too. "I had it first", "Mommy, he hit me", "No!!!"...these are all phrases I hear on a daily basis. So obviously, if the little lady is miserable, we all are. Why is she miserable, you ask?? Who knows. On any given day, the meltdowns can occur for various reasons but most commonly, from being overtired. I know I'm a grouch when I haven't slept well and the same goes for kids, just tenfold.
I'm really lucky and grateful to have girlfriends who are in the same boat. We are all navigating the choppy, shark-infested waters that is raising kids. It's not always fun, not always appreciated and most days, I want to throw in the towel.  Most moms I know are juggling kids, a home, cooking, cleaning and whatever else crosses our paths throughout the day. And not surprisingly, most of us are doing the bulk of it ourselves. Yes, we have loving hubbies who take out the occasional bin of trash, run the lawnmower once in a while or give a bath here or there. But let's face it, the majority of the work falls on us moms. Although we have evolved immensely over the last fifty years, I bet most stay-home-moms can relate to June Cleaver on some level. The desire to look pulled together, have a clean home and a hot dinner on the table nightly, all while breaking up the latest living room brawl can be overwhelming to say the least. But we strive for that unattainable perfection anyway. There is something about "just" being a mom that I think makes us feel like we have to work harder than the average bear to avoid people wondering what it is we do all day.
But let's break it down here. The average employee works a nine hour day, with a quiet lunch and breaks built in, not to mention the ride to work and back to enjoy peace and quiet. Their nights and weekends are free and they typically earn some paid vacation time. So...what position would the stay-home-mom resemble?? Unpaid nanny? Slave? It's a grueling, thankless job and one that is as exhausting mentally as it is physically. You mean you don't want to read that book again or enjoy sitting on the floor cross-legged playing cars?? Yea, me neither but it's those moments your kids will remember.
So if you've ever raised your voice loudly enough at your kids that you hoped the neighbors didn't hear or pinched your child a little too hard while walking them to time out OR cursed at them under your breath (guilty on all counts!), then apologize and move on. Your kids are not going to remember these you remember your parent's flawed moments?? I doubt it. They will more likely remember the hours you spent reading, playing, singing, helping, cuddling, baking and loving on them. And THAT is what makes it all worthwhile! Go easy on yourself, friends. No mom is perfect and we all have "those days". Join the club!

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